The third wheel.

At some point in their lives most people have found themselves, usually inadvertently, cast in the role of the third wheel. Not a horrible situation usually, just typically uncomfortable. You are, of course, highly conscious that you have set yourself up to be noticed sans a date/partner of some sort. I guess for some people this is a problem. Not so for I. You could almost call me an old pro. I�ve been the third wheel since some of you were still wearing diapers. After mastering the third wheel I tried my luck at being fifth and - yes! � even the seventh wheel. I don�t recommend trying for the fifth or seventh wheel until you have many years of third wheeling under your belt. The results could be disastrous.

�If you are so used to being a third wheel, why is this post titled Adventures in Awkwardness? Is this all some clever ruse?�

Shut the hell up for a minute and let me finish my story. Geez.

Anyway, like I was saying, I have no problem being the third wheel. Usually. Tonight was, to say the least, very different. As all zero of you that have read my previous posts know, I am quite smitten with a good friend of mine. A little too smitten, especially since she is in a happy, long relationship. Hooray for her. I�m certainly not trying to bust them up, but that doesn�t mean I don�t think about her all damn day. It�s much much easier when she is off at school. It�s easier to control my feelings when I don�t have see her, to be inches away from her and have all the reasons I feel the way I do thrown in my face over and over. Yeah, she�s beautiful, but so are a lot of girls. It�s the way she speaks and what she says. It�s the way she can just look at me and make me smile. I honestly can�t be with her and be unhappy. It�s never happened. Despite all this, I didn�t even know she still thought about me till she came back from school for the summer and gave me a call. Enter: old feelings. Big time. I completely and totally loved this girl, but never did anything about it, really. I figured I had missed my chance and moved on. Well, not moved on, but given up. Now that she�s back, so are the old feelings that drive me crazy. Throw into the mix the current boyfriend and it�s happy fun time for ole spork-master. But back to tonight.

A few hours ago she gives me a call and invites me to go see 28 Days. In my head I was all �hell yeah� but then I figured out that I wasn�t being asked to go with just her, but with her and her boyfriend. Dilemma. I hate missing any opportunity to hang around her, but being the third wheel this night seemed different from any other time I�ve been the odd man out. I�m the third person nearly every single day with these two, but tonight was just�. I guess it�s that it was a movie, in a theater � a traditional American date type situation. I tried to beg my way out, suggesting they needed a date night, perhaps. She was having none of that, which made me frustrated but pleased at the same time. She likes having me around. That's a nice thing to know.

When we got to the movie, it was sold out. I wasn�t shocked since we got there late and it is a weekend. Anyway, we ended up seeing League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. Ah, nothing says good times like a beautiful woman and a movie based on a graphic novel. And to think, those two things would have been mutually exclusive just a few years back. Thank you, X-Men. The movie was��well, disappointing, but that�s not even why I was there. I was there for her. Two seats down. Oh yes, that�s right. I was sitting by her boyfriend. Wow. I wasn�t a total loss due only to the fact that the only seats left in the theater happened to be next to a friend of mine. At one point I was actually having her boyfriend pass her notes for me. The best part was when the guy leaves to go to the bathroom and I get to talk to her for a bit. Sometimes, she�ll just look at me and wink and I want to grab her and run find someone with the powers invested in them by the state of Georgia to link her to me forever. But I digress. Eventually he comes back and its back to watching the movie, eyes forward: must...not�let�feelings�show.

The movie ended and they took me home and they went off on their own. Depression. I know I should get over her and move on, and maybe I will one day, but for now I�m pretty hooked. What sucks is I don�t even get the decency of a good old-fashioned rejection. I have to sit and be silent and smile when this guy is touching her leg in my apartment. Grr. She goes back to school in about two weeks so things will suck around here, but at least I�ll be able to get back to not having to fake like I have no romantic interest in her. I�m thinking of getting myself into a bad situation and having a traumatic event so I can block out my feelings. That would be nice. Or maybe a coma. I could dream of jousting monkeys for all time. Now that would be cool.

When it is all said and done, I probably have no real chance with this girl. I understand that. And like I said, I would never try to come between them. They seem to be pretty happy most of the time, and she lives a good bit away now. Who knows, one day. If God wants it, it�ll happen, I guess. If not, there�s always mail order brides. I just can�t decide between the Thai and Russian. I guess which ever comes with the longest warranty.

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